Sexual Myths and Your Relationship
Myth #3: Orgasm is the point, isn't it?
Orgasm = 6 to 9 Seconds of Bliss
Someone once calculated that the average male orgasm lasts between 6 and 9 seconds, and with the average frequency of orgasm the total time spent in orgasmic bliss in a lifetime was about eight hours. That doesn't seem like very much, for an entire lifetime!
It's the Journey
Making an ejaculatory climax the whole purpose of sex is similar to taking a long journey through beautiful scenery with eyes squeezed tightly shut, asking only, "Are we there yet?" This stingy approach to the manifold pleasures of sex shortchanges everyone.
Male and female genitals are loaded with nerve endings, with greater density than any other part of the body. That's why sexual touch feels pleasurable. Holding the breath and straining to reach orgasm shuts off many pleasurable sensations.
Was It Good for You?
There is a sort of gunslinger mentality in American culture about orgasms. Each one is another notch in the belt - without an orgasm, the sexual exchange isn't complete or worthwhile. Post-coital conversation is too often limited to: "Did you come?"
Sex as Meditation
Tantra teaches a meditative approach to sex, where breath and wordless connection amplify the intensity of sexual pleasure without falling over the cliff of orgasm. Maintaining a high state of arousal while at the same time being completely relaxed results in an unimaginable, timeless state of ecstatic bliss.
Orgasm is a delightful and profound experience. But it can be so much more than nine seconds of pelvic muscle spasm. Take some time to explore what is possible!