by David Yarian on February 14, 2012
Marty Klein is one of my favorite authors. He’s a sex therapist in Palo Alto who consistently publishes thought-provoking books, filled with fresh ideas and revolutionary concepts about sexuality and healthy sexual relationships.
His new book – just released — is Sexual Intelligence: What We Really Want From Sex, And How to Get It, published by Harper Collins.
Here’s what Marty says about the book:
“In my 31 years of therapy with couples and individuals , I keep hearing people say that what they want from sex is pleasure and closeness. And yet most people focus on other things during sex–how they look, what their partner is thinking, how they compare to others, whether they’re normal, or the dreaded ‘performance.’”
Sexual Intelligence is filled with ideas about how to create enjoyable sex in your intimate relationship. The advice is practical and down to earth. Marty has a gift for telling stories about real people in real situations.
I heartily recommend this book to anyone wanting fresh perspective on being part of a successful intimate relationship! I’ll be doing a complete book review soon. But, hey – beat me to it! Grab a copy and read this now!
by David Yarian on February 12, 2012
It surprises me, though it probably shouldn’t, how sex is often portrayed in popular movies. What gets me is how quickly it occurs. Two people are having an intense conversation and suddenly clothes are coming off (or not) and without so much as a kiss or a lingering caress, they are having intercourse.
While this does occasionally occur in real life, it’s not the norm. And it sets the bar really high for viewers whose sexual experiences may look nothing like what’s on the screen. I understand, that’s part of why we watch movies. But there’s a subtle way in which what we see on the screen works its way into our minds and shapes expectations. In my twenties I noticed that after watching an action movie, when I left the theater I was driving faster, taking corners faster, somehow still “in” the movie I’d just seen.
What I’m protesting here is when directors use an abbreviated version of sex to communicate the notion of sexual passion and personal connection in a movie. Maybe I just want to linger with the part of the story that shows how two people can feel very intense feelings, take the risk to reach out for a sexual connection, and experience deep pleasure. It’s confusing when parts of the story get left out.
